Have you ever said this to yourself before...
" I'll start when I have more confidence."
We wait for the courage to make a change and hope some day it will land in our lap. How long has this mindset kept you frozen where you are and unable to move forward or take the baby step needed to get get started.
The chances are, you've been waiting a while and the confidence hasn't arrived?
It's the ACTION that we take that creates the confidence and not the other way round. We all have had to start from the beginning at some point. Had to feel nervous and vulnerable, worry about failing or not doing it as well as we'd thought we could or fallen down and felt embarrassed.
Do you compare yourself to those who have got what you want and wish you had their confidence to do it?
As the Dalai Lama quotes 'a common mistake is to have expectations of quick results. I feel it is more wise to practice without eyes anxious for signs of quick enlightenment.'
During your path of change, you may feel like you're not getting anywhere. Some days seem like you've even gone backwards and completely tests your ability or confidence to move forward and through the frustration that overwhelms your mad monkey mind. But overtime the small acts of the habit will create a profound change in your life.
I love this analogy I read in my latest read. If you want to start a fire by rubbing 2 sticks together, it won't happen if you stop and start and most defiantly not if you just think about it. I mention it so much but the secret is PRACTICE and CONSISTENCY. 10 minutes everyday is so much more realistic and worthwhile rather than 2 hours over a month.
To help you with your motivation along the way, focus on your performance rather than the results.
I'll use exercise as an example. You have started exercising and your MAD Monkey mind is telling you that you can't see a difference in your waistline. Your mind questions whether this is worthwhile and perhaps it's time you give up as its a complete waste of time. It's taken me so much mental and physical effort to get here with no results with how I look. Just look at that role of fat. (I've heard women talk to themselves like this many times.)
Where do you get your motivation from at this point? Instead, focus on your performance. Can you do an extra push up that you couldn't do before. Can you hold the plank for longer, can you lift that heavy box of wine from the car which you couldn't do before (a genuine observation from one of my clients.)
Slow and steady wins the race and embarks on the biggest changes, not counting your kilos on the scale every day out of habit and to aid your mind into shaming you.
What can you do now that you couldn't do before? What changes in your mind have you done by doing the mental push ups that you didn't do before? Saying no to the mind making you feel guilty for taking time out and honoring the action. The consistent action it takes to maintain your new sustainable habit.
Guess what, it all comes down and starts with the internal chatter of the mind. Watch those thoughts and know you can overcome any blocks.
The start is the hardest part, the rest is just repeat.
Speak soon x
Everything we do is because of a feeling we want or a feeling we want to get away from . Change begins with your thoughts. Struggling and punishing the change out of you won't last.
Any action we take is because of a feeling we want to feel; a habit, an item, a lifestyle. It's not the actual destination but the good feeling we think we will feel when we get there.
Wherever you are right now has come about from a thought. Our thoughts create our feelings which determine what action we will take.